Help, I’m out of ideas!
This is pathetic, y’all. This, this right here, is why I could never be a really for real writer.
I’ve been thinking the last few days about Christmas. Christmaaaas! Imagine that in Oprah voice and sparkly font, because I don’t know how to do that. (The sparkly font part. I know how to do Oprah voice.) I don’t know what it is, because Christmas-when-it-is-not-Christmas is one of my pet peeves, but I could totally be 100%, head over heels in the Christmas spirit right now. I am resisting so hard, because Thanksgiving comes first and it gets the shaft as it is, so I try to celebrate only one holiday at a time. I’ve managed not to break out the Christmas music yet, although I do have Buble’s new one standing by for Thanksgiving evening. I’ve walked through Walmart’s Christmas section more than once and, so help me, Walmart made me sing along to Frosty the other day. I didn’t want to! The Walmart made me!
This is so weird because last year it took me forrreeeevvvvveerrrrrrrr to get in the Christmas spirit. I don’t even know, y’all, but I was a total Grinch. (Compared to my usual level of festivity, that is.) This year, I am ALL ABOUT IT. Bring on the Christmas, I am READY. I have almost completed my shopping. Don’t hate me because I’m amazing.
Where am I even going with this? … Oh yes, I remember. So I’ve been thinking about Christmas, and as soon as I start thinking in that direction my thoughts turn to food. I do some massive Christmas baking and candy-making and it is just about the most fun part of the whole thing, and this year it’s going to be even FUNNER because I’m making a supply list for Sam’s Club. Have you been to Sam’s? Everyone needs to experience it. I have only been once, but you guys? Sam’s is my new happy place. (Along with Hobby Lobby. In my perfect world, Hobby Lobby and Sam’s live next door to each other just down the block from Disney World.) So I’m planning this trip sometime during the beginning of December, when I’ll go to Sam’s for baking supplies and take my sister to [undisclosed pretty pretty makeup store] to pick out her Christmas present. Basically, it will be just about the best day of my life.
And you think I’m kidding, but I am so not kidding.